It is strange how so many mothers seem to have ensured that their children loved them, needed them, adored them, even worshipped them....but somehow left out 'respect them' from the deal.
It is not so strange that so many men can love, adore, need even worship their wives but somehow leave out 'respect' from the deal.
What then is the difference between a pet and a wife?
9 comments:
@ kids, respect needs to be earned, not taught.
@ husbands, well men are just scum of the earth compared to women. Seriously.
- Z
kids : i think too many times love is accepted as a substitute for respect...the line has to be drawn by the parent.
men...well, i dont know if i would take it that far .... i know too many nice ones :)
A kids sphere of experience and learning is never just his parents. When the child develops her own understanding of 'respect' and also starts to view his parents objectively (not as 'objecting' which is what most of us tend towards as parents), then you get respect if you deserve it through your child's prism.
Thats a long sentence..phew. I think my IQ just peaked at 80, which means I can walk out the door now..
Men - Ok. Enjoy:) Just wait for the book someday though. Heh.
This is a continually changing two-way traffic lane. One can do all the "ensuring" one wants to do, but relationships are two-way and they change over a period of time...so how love or respect is generated and maintained will change as the relationship matures and will depend on how the individuals in the relationship, be it mother and son or wife and hubby, set boundaries and treat each other mutually....(this is a pet topic of mine ;)
The problem is, women glorify their men. And teach their sons that they are demi-Gods. They don't need to respect anyone else, as they are veritably the best! No wonder they grow up into insensitive fools.
I think we mums have an opportunity now, to bring up our kids well. Teach them to show respect and love at the same time. To everyone! Not just their dads!
So true Arch, so very true!
But, I am not entirely sure if the responsibility lies solely with men. I have seen some mothers undermine their authorithy by passing on all decision making to the fathers or on to a male authorithy figure. Love and respect are two different things. I think women need to differentiate between the two and insist on both. From Husbands, sons and even fathers.
zak: that sentence was so long that the child went from being a boy to a girl and back to being a boy :) Agreed that respect has to be earned...just that when it comes to parents and wives, they are taken so much for granted!
ganga : am glad you mentioned the other relationships as well because i do believe the same applies everywhere. 'Set boundaries' - defining term! :)
pal : hee hee...sorry...dont usually see you use this tone :p But i have a theory about why men were deified. It actually comes down to money methinks. A wife knows she will most probably outlive her husband. So who is next in line? Voila! The son becomes an investment like insurance! Also explains the son fixation that indian families have - its more than just carrying on the 'family name'..Its a sick, vicious, dependency cycle.
Rekz : I am also saying its not the men...but the women who create this state of affairs. Your last two lines sum it up perfectly.
That was actually on purpose..:)
Yeah right! Jobless AND delusional!! :p
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